Easily Annoyed

There are multiple things that I have picked up from my parents. Chalk it up to genetics and 30+ years of socialization. One of the things I inherited from my mom was the propensity to get annoyed easily by little noises. I've told Gail about this and she is supposed to just ignore my comments when she makes this annoying sound when she drinks anything from a bottle - she refuses to place her lips appropriately on the bottle and so wraps her lips around the edge thus making this popping/sucking sound when she pulls the bottle away from her lips. She knows and I know that the noise annoys me. We have learned to deal with it. But, there are some things that people do that irk me to no end.

1. Don't smack! There is no need to chew that freaking wad of gum with your mouth open. You look and sound like Fran Drescher when you do it and it really rakes on my nerves. Stop it!

2. Don't talk so darned loud on your cell phone! Is there any need to be in a bookstore shouting on your phone? Step outside if you have to yell at the caller.

3. Take those stupid glass pipes off of your Honda Civic. It does not make the little car any cooler to make it sound like a chain saw in your ear.

4. Related to #3 - Your stupid Harley is cool, but does it have to be so freaking loud and do you have to drive in a group of ten other Harleys that are equally loud while I am sipping coffee outside of a nice coffee shop?

5. I am sure that the seeker service you just attended was powerful and uplifting, but do you have to sing the praise song out loud as you walk around campus/work/where ever?

6. Who are you talking to? Don't talk to yourself. I might answer, thinking you are talking to me.

7. We are in a library. Shut up!

8. I am in a library working on my computer and listening to music on headphones. You are in the same library sitting five feet away on your own computer listening to your own music. I should not be able to hear your music coming out of your headphones over the music that is coming out of mine.

9. I realize the seats on planes don't give much leg room, but do you have to kick the back of my seat every time you adjust your position. And, if you travel with a kid, keep an eye on his/her legs. I am liable to break one of them if they kick the back of my seat one more time!

10. Share the arm rest you pig! Movies, planes, conferences, whatever.

11. That thing between your legs is not so big that you have to spread your legs so far apart that I have to sit to one side of my theater seat to avoid knocking knees with you.

I'm only scratching the surface.


ke said...

you would HATE to work in a hospital. there is constantly loud talkers, people shouting over the intercom, pagers beeping, phones ringing...

lardawg said...

sounds like someone's got a case of the "Monday's".

jmac said...

actually, #11 is true for me...sorry. next time i'm in Cali I'll buy you a beer.

mikey said...

i hear you. somedays i hate everyone for doing everything. why can't everyone be just like me?